Thursday, Thursday

I have so many emotions running through me these days, I don't know how to sort them all out. Thursday is Addison's MRI. According to the "insurance specialist" (fancy name for bill collector) that called me from Cook Children's, it's a brain MRI. I was a little taken back by this tid bit of information. I thought it was an MRI of her upper GI. But no, we are checking to make sure there aren't any other reasons for her developmental delays. She is also having an EGD and an impedence Ph probe, which are both to test for reflux.

These three tests come with a hefty price tag of around $8,000. Another little shocking tid bit of information. Hence the bill collector, I mean, insurance specialist, calling me on Monday. She wanted to verify insurance and collect $1200 from me. What!?!? $1200??? Well, after my past experience of over paying my OB/GYN and not getting that money returned to me for nearly a year, I called my insurance company before I agreed to pay fancy "insurance specialist" lady any money.

So after calling my insurance this morning, I discover that Cook Children's is out-of-network on my insurance. And there are NO children hospitals on my insurance. WHAT!?!? Seriously? Does my insurance company really think it's appropriate for a 14-month old to get these procedures done at a hospital that doesn't treat children? Seriously!?! So because Cook is Cook, and is a company that actually lives up to their motto of providing exceptional care, they will not charge us at out-of-network prices. What a relief!

So many emotions...relief that this whole experience won't put a strain on my finances, anger that my insurance company doesn't provide adequate and appropriate care for my child, and anxiety. So much anxiety about how these tests are going to go and the anxiety of not knowing. And the anxiety of what if...But in the end, hope. Hope that Addison does not have cystic fibrosis or something worse. Hope that if she does have something wrong with her that it's treatable. And hope that she will get better soon. Hope. And of course, in the end, optimism.